Out of the Mouths of Babes, Part 23

Jack Henry, in a whisper in the van: “Hey Bennett, I be the good manners.”


At lunch, when I repeated for the one millionth time, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all,” Bennett replied, “Well, I guess I just can’t talk then.”


Luke, explaining what college is to Bennett: “You go there and take classes to learn about what job you want to do when you grow up. And, you get a girlfriend.”


I found a grape in Jack Henry’s cup of milk at lunch one day. His explanation? “That grape triiiiieeeed to float, but it just couldn’t! It sank!”


Jack Henry and I were walking through Hobby Lobby, and I picked up a small bouquet of fake flowers.  He said, “Oh, Mom, you should use those for your wedding!”

I reminded him that I was already married.  To his dad.

He smiled and said, “Oh, yeah.  Your husband.”


Jack Henry loves to talk to cashiers, like last week when he told a Trader Joe’s checkout guy that he was awesome. For no apparent reason other than he was good at bagging groceries. Comments like these make for a fun outing. But…

Today I experienced one that made me wish I had the superpower of invisibility: at Michael’s, a woman who is not native to the US was our cashier. She greeted us with a cheery “hello”, except it sounded more like “hewwo.” To which Jack Henry said, “Hewwo to you! Mom, she just said ‘hewwo’.” I sincerely hope that she just thought he had a toddler speech impediment.

4 responses to “Out of the Mouths of Babes, Part 23

  1. after the hewwo story, i want to start singing the “hewwo motha, hewwo fatha, fleas ticks and mosquitoes really botha” commercial. hilarious.

  2. Wish I could vote for a favorite, but they’re all too cute!!!

  3. This post and the comments have provided a great laugh for the day! I don’t think “motherhood” at our house was ever quite this entertaining!

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