A few months ago, Jon Acuff wrote this post about his favorite way to make decisions. It’s brief and very good; please go read it and come back here.
When I think back on my childhood and the things that shaped it, I think of funny family vernacular, like “Cardinal John” for Parmesan (my brother’s toddler misunderstanding, which stuck). I think of our long drives to Santa Fe to visit my mom’s sister, Dee, and her wonderful family. I think of my cousins living down the street from us, and best friends living down the other direction, and all of the games we played and how we caught crawdads in the ditch. (Well, I didn’t actually catch them. I supervised.) I think of church every Sunday without fail.
So what are we doing? What stories do I hope our kids tell?
Reading nights, where once a summer, the boys get to stay up as late as they want as long as they’re reading (1 and 2am this year, if I’m remembering correctly).
Backyard and basement campouts.
Ice cream surprise night.
Vacations. To part of Matt’s family lore at the cottage at Lake Delavan, and to other parts of the country that we’ve enjoyed exploring with them.
M&Ms ever-present (although, only eaten a small handful at a time for dessert, if that’s their choice that night).
Games, like Ticket to Ride, Clue, and many others, played on a regular basis.
Prayers every night before bed.
That their mom wouldn’t short-order cook for them, and made them try new things, and therefore, now, they’re great, adventurous eaters. Hey, a mom can dream.
Of course, there WILL be unpleasant memories, too. But we’re focusing on the positives right now, ‘kay?
We asked them what kinds of things we do that they’ll want to do with their own kids, and they said having us come up to their room every night to give them a hug and a kiss before bed (this almost made me cry when Bennett said it!) and Saturday morning donuts (Luke’s contribution). Jack said he’s going to be just like his dad.
I am totally in love with the idea of making decisions based on the lore they’ll create for our kids. It will be so fun to someday sit around with the boys and hear them reflect on the things that stuck with them from childhood.
So tell me…what’s part of your lore, or what lore are you creating for your family?