Endings are Sad.

They just are sometimes.

When Luke was about 9 months old, we noticed that he liked to grab the burp rag off our shoulder and lay it across his face while he was drinking a bottle (sad face, because I can’t find the picture we had of this). It started to be a little game with him, and then we realized that he liked to rub it gently on his cheek while he was drinking his last bottle of the night.

So, we started letting him take it into his crib at night and naptime.

napping at 10.5 months, lovey tucked under his arm.

And before long, a lovey was born. This was not what we’d planned, of course…I had a couple of cute loveys with satin edges and the like, but he didn’t want those…he wanted the burp cloths. After a while we realized he preferred 2 of them to others, so the rest were put away to be used as burp rags with the next babies, and these other 3, from a set from Target, were kept as his loveys.

One of them was brought to Nana Jo and Papa Ron’s house pretty early on, so that if we somehow got to Effingham and didn’t bring one with us, there was one there for him to use. We got that one back a couple of years ago and because it was relatively unused, it remained in significantly better shape than the other 2.

He was never one of those crazy-obsessed lovey kids…probably primarily because I never let him bring it anywhere with us unless we were spending the night somewhere (SIDENOTE: seeing kids drag a dirty doll/blanket/lovey around in public majorly grosses me out…I gag thinking of that thing then going into bed with them). It was kept in his crib, and later, his bed, and he could fall asleep without it but definitely preferred not to.

By age 5 or so, he still slept with it, but it was not that important anymore. However, when asked, he did always still just want them in his room. Over the years, they’ve still, for some reason, just been in his room. Not actually slept with for years…in fact, since moving into this house, they’ve spent most of the time underneath the bunk beds in a little heap.

Last night, after I changed the sheets on the bunks (an act that makes me feel like a superhero mom…for real, why is changing bunk sheets one of the things I hate most?), I saw those old rags laying on the floor and asked if it would be OK if I moved them to Luke’s memory box up in the closet. He said sure, dismissing me without really even giving it a second thought.

a bit tattered at this point.

i don't think these were designed to be washed repeatedly for years.

Of course, I knew he didn’t really care anymore and hadn’t for years, but it was still sad to see those things that were so important to him be just completely outgrown (Velveteen Rabbit, anyone?).

Today, they’re in the wash. Tomorrow, the memory box.

14 responses to “Endings are Sad.

  1. Danny was a burpee boy, too. Nick a thumb sucker and had a clown, Drew a bink, but Dan liked to chew on the burpee all night. In the morning it would be all wet. (Can you say GROSS). We had about 6 of them. When we lost one in Target, it was tramatic. Eventually, they started to shred into scraps. We had to throw them away. Eventually we were down to an emergency 1. We had to hide it. We found it about a year ago up in the closet. 🙂

    • Ha! No wonder they’re friends 🙂

      My other 2 boys took pacifiers, but Luke never really took to it, and didn’t suck his thumb, so holding the burp rag was it!

  2. oh, how sweet. this makes me wish I could hold him again when he was so tiny. not so much anymore!!! 😦

  3. Hi, my name is Lindsey, I am 28 years old and still sleep with my baby blanket. No more explanation needed other than I don’t sleep with a pillow, I use my blanket to prop my head up (I sleep on my back).

    Connor have a large blanket that he sleeps with. It stays in his crib and only makes it out of the house if we are on a trip to St. Louis or headed to the sitter’s. Come Friday, after being back and forth to the sitter’s and home, that gets put in the wash immediately.

  4. I know where you’re coming from with this one. They’re growing up… 😦

  5. Lindsey, I’m 37 and do the same thing too. Mind you it stays at home at all times and I’m on the 4th one. It’s nice to know I’m not alone 🙂

  6. Let me add that while registering for my daughter (now 3) it was my mom (and perhaps you, Nicole) that recommended buying 2 loveys so that they don’t go without while the other is being washed. We rotate them on a weekly basis this way so that the “feel” is the same. Fabulous advice for new mamas.

  7. Awwwwww . . . I’d forgotten all about Luke’s loveys!!!!!!!

    As you know, all 3 of our kids had those loose-woven Carter’s baby blankets–Matt’s–blue; Heidi’s–pink; Andrea’s–yellow–and all 3 used them as their “loveys” (“vah-vahs”!). They only used them in bed, and Heidi & Andrea also added pacis to their routine. They all got their old, ratty vah-vahs wrapped up when they got married! 🙂

  8. Awww… Now this takes me back. My girls both had blankees, and Valerie in particular took forever to let it go. Unfortunately we had to wean her off it because she was sucking on it and they were afraid her teeth would never grow correctly. Brooke just loved to hold hers. Great post!

  9. Awe, that’s sweet! I think those things are way more important to us than them! I’m totally with you on the no blankies in public, too.

  10. As a former daycare provide, I think those “security blankets” are great comforts to children who need a little “extra” I bought my second granddaughter two “vah-vahs” after sewing satin trim on my son’s favorite three times. He liked to rub it across his upper lip as he fell asleep. It still remains, although the only thing left of it is the sorry looking border of satin. When he went off to collage, I slipped it under his pillow, he never mentioned it, but I saw it when we moved him out of collage. Old friends are hard to give up sometimes.

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