Not Little Anymore.

You know how every once in a while, you glance at one of your kids, and they all-of-a-sudden look older? Like the way they walk or concentrate on something or look at you, and in moments, they seem like they’ve aged or grown.

Yesterday, Matt commented as Bennett came upstairs to get dressed for his last baseball game of the 2013 season that he looked older. Bennett questioned him, likely confused because Matt had just seen him an hour prior, and we told him that happens sometimes; sometimes, something about you just looks older (and we aren’t talking about the fact that your baseball pants, hemmed to perfection in April, are now literally 3″ too short).

Surely this comment of Matt’s was still in the back of my mind as I loaded these pictures onto my computer this morning. Because I took one look at Bennett and nearly broke into tears. His sweet (oh, who am I kidding, ornery) baby face is gone, replaced by the face of a 3rd grader with janky teeth (heaven help us, his mouth is going to need some serious fixing) and leaner features. And seeing him in these base-running pictures, with that look of concentration on his face, taking the game he loves so seriously (and yet, his is the laugh you’re likely first to hear whoop from the dugout, lest you think he’s not having fun), just solidified it: I have 2 big kids now, and one that’s not exactly a baby anymore, either.

b running bases 1

paying close attention.

b running bases 2

note to bennett, when he reads this someday when he’s older: your third base coach, who happens to be your dad, thinks you’re a really smart base runner.

b outfield

obviously, this is not a good picture in terms of focus, etc…i was playing around with my new camera yesterday. but this is the one that made me stop because he looked so old. (also – it was chilly for the first time yesterday, so note his batting glove inside his glove!)

—–

A couple of years ago, when Jack Henry didn’t want me to leave his room at bedtime, he said to me, “I want to be with you all the days and all the nights.” Which was adorable to me, of course*. To Bennett, this was hilarious. I mean laugh-out-loud cackling hilarious.

So for the last couple of years, every once in a while, Bennett will jokingly say this to me as I tuck him in. He whispers it in my ear while he hugs me, almost like it’s our little remembrance of Jack Henry’s toddler cuteness and how attached to me he was (and still is).

Lately, though, when Bennett says it, I really try to enjoy that moment with him. He’s just growing up, and I don’t want to lose those little moments of connection with him.

Sorry. This just got all Debbie Downer totally by accident.

I just love my kids being young and at home is all, and it’s going by too fast.

Happy Monday, everyone!

*Just for the record, boys, even though I think this is super cute: I do need you to want to move out at some point and go to school and get a job.

3 responses to “Not Little Anymore.

  1. *sniff *sniff. Ditto. I have a high schooler now, and it’s like his days with him at home with us are literally ticking down and it bums the heck outta me.

  2. owensjudy@aol.com

    This one made me cry!

    Judy O

  3. This was hard to read for Nana Jo!! I completely know what you mean, & the startling realization is even more poignant as a grandparent, having the additional perspective of seeing not only my grandsons getting to be “middle & old childhood age” but also seeing my own kids at the adult ages I feel like I should still be! The boys also seem so old in comparison to how little the granddaughters all are! I especially wish time could stop–or pause for a much longer time!!–for you guys because you are truly at a wonderful stage w/ your boys!!!

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